im blogging alot. my mind is going.

i need to go to bed soon, but i just want to talk a little bit, and i have no idea who to call. i dont like calling people at this time of night, because its not late enough for them to really say, hey, i just want to wind down and go to bed. well, some people would. but yea.
im thinking about my  sabbath year that i am not 2 months into. leviticus talks about the land just growing what it will in that time. and the people resting, letting it grow, and using it.
there is growth that i have not planted. {can i just say, i LOVE that my sabbath year will also be the year i turn 30!?? ok]
there is growth that i have not planned.there, waiting in the soil of my life, are nutrients and possibilities that have just been dormant. i have planned and planted and watered and all that jazz, and it has been good. God has handed seeds over at times as well-- almost all the time. there are some things that were planted and cultivated that never should have been, had choked good out and killed alot. thankfully God uses these and there was fertilization from this death.
and now , all that has been waiting in THESE years is going to start spouting. what will be fruitful, what will be flowering, what will be shading and holding earth intact against the elements. ya know. all this metaphor.
i have a thought---i feel risky thinking it, and saying it. if you work [ed] with me at my job, you will [would] laugh at what im about to say:
its all good.
holding strongly [albeit small-ly] in my gut is the trust and belief that EVERYTHING that comes out of this year is GOOD
its blowing my mind.
and, i hold that gravely, knowing that, even right now, some people close to me are dealing with pain and fear and stress over the future of their business, poss death, money crisis....all the things just mentioned are different families. its crazy. and i wonder how he can give me such peace and i dont have any difficulty, while dear hearts suffer. i know all the theology and reasoning [ and lovingkindness!] behind the answer  to that. i still want to ask.